Test yourself with this trendy baby clothes parenting quiz

Get your number 2 pencils ready, I’m testing your parenting knowledge. Oh shit, I already look like a dinosaur.

Nowadays, testing would be done on computers, not Scantron. OK, well… Imagine this happening on a Chromebook and I’ll upload your results to Canvas.

Have I ever lost you? Good. Prepare to be even more confused.

Today’s pop quiz is about key vocabulary words that new parents know. But don’t worry, at least it’s multiple choice.

Choose the best definition for the following:

1. Baby Breeza

A. Essential oil diffuser for the nursery

B. Formula Dispenser

C. Air filter

D. Easy-to-use cloth diapers

2. Snoo

A. Robotic Cradle

B. Hat that monitors a baby’s temperature

C. Toddler Food in a Squeezable Pouch

D. App that assembles photos into an instant baby book

3. Oogie Bear

A. Vibrating plush

B. A washable glove for the bath

C. Teddy Bear Ice Bag for Injuries

D. Nose and Ear Gadget

4. Hatch

A. Portable Safety Gate

B. Plastic food container for toddlers

C. Sound machine and night light

D. Door jumper

5. Willow

A. Bassinet made from sustainably harvested wood

B. Dehumidifier

C.Baby monitor

D. Portable breast pump

6. Wubbanub

A. Cradle cap cream

B. Wallaby shaped bathtub

C. Pacifier with attached soft toy

D. Toddler Scooter

7. Windy

A. Fart whistle that fits in the buttocks

B. Sun visor for the car

C. Musical Mobile

D. Grocery Cart Seat Protector

8. Soothe

A. Teether

B. Vibrating chair

C. One piece pacifier

D. Aloe Breast Pad

9. Halo

A. Wearable cover

B. Video game series

C. Cradle

All the foregoing

10. Owl

A. Educational app for toddlers

B. Surveillance sock and camera

C. Extra soft car seat

D. College Savings Account

Answer key: 1:B, 2:A, 3:D, 4:C, 5:D, 6:C, 7:A, 8:C, 9:D, 10:B

Classification diagnosis:

8-10: When was the last time you slept or took a shower? It looks like you are a brand new parent.

5-7: Are you a grandparent? You know many of these objects but refuse to use a Windi.

1-4: You suspect I made up some of these words, don’t you? If anything, I went easy on you. Basically, I tucked you in a Bobby, filled an EZPZ with the liquid from a Haakaa, and put it in your mouth. You’re welcome.

Jennifer Bardsley publishes books under her own name and under the pseudonym Louise Cypress. Find her online on Instagram @jenniferbardsleyauthor, on Twitter @jennbardsley or on Facebook as author Jennifer Bardsley. Email her at [email protected]


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